Men’s 2nd XI vs TTFKAOB (Home) | 26 Feb 22

Drew 4-4

Scorers: C. Figgis, M. Farrer (2), N. Buckingham

MoM: C. Figgis or M.Farrer (both got votes, but not everyone voted)

DoD: A. Dunn

The best thing about Saturday was the sunshine and the sunshine was best enjoyed from the dugout that I spent much of the game sat in. It was arguably the place to be because what was going on the pitch was fairly uninspiring, albeit not short of incident.
The coach’s pre-match analysis identified that this week’s opposition had a PC threat. To counter this the decision was made to leave the PC protective gear in my cupboard at home – that way we would have an extra incentive not to concede any corners. This largely worked, although rather than concede PCs we instead conceded two penalty strokes, which I have to say was an unforeseen consequence of the approach. In my defence, the first penalty stroke was unforeseen full stop but it is unbecoming to question decisions and it happened two days ago so not something I’m worrying about any more. Sporting karma was restored later in the day when Rodri got away with one against Everton and I am expecting a letter of gratitude from Pep this week to thank us for taking one for his team.
Anyway, the team formerly known as Old Bordenians scored the flick. We probably should’ve been two-nil up by this point, so we decided to equalise through Figgy. Figgy has now almost fully transitioned and is believed to be identifying as a forward.
I came off to sit in the sun and once again against the run of play TTFKAOB scored another penalty flick. We equalised through a PS of our own (M. Farrer), awarded for one of the many assaults committed on the minors in the Canterbury team. It takes a real man to rough up a 15-year-old on a hockey pitch and TTFKAOB were a team of real men. Fortunately, the CHC youngsters are a resilient bunch and also aware that greater challenges lay ahead in their careers, which can’t really be said for the opposition who were more concerned about the ability to “get older”.
In what was becoming nonsensical, TTFKAOB scored a PC (thank you to Ali for providing some PC protective gear), so again we equalised…via another penalty stroke (M. Farrer), 3-3 at halftime.
Second half, another PC conceded left Canterbury 4-3 down with time running out, but Nick Buckingham doesn’t concern himself with trivial matters such as time, he just scores goals. Canterbury should have won the game, but didn’t and that is that.
Fair award for DOD, forgetting the PC kit wasn’t cool and votes for that are accepted. However, votes for having a promiscuous dog really show the gender inequality that still exists in our society today. Whilst Cool Hand Luke (who had clearly lost his edge like his predecessor and hero Richard Keir used to do) was winning acclaim for his Friday night/Saturday morning antics, my poor dog was being demonised by her jilted doxy for sharing her affections with a new man. I just really hope the palpable tension between Lloydy and Lummers has dissipated before next week.

In other news, Eddie played three games for England in half-term and didn’t concede any goals. Clearly occasionally having to fetch the ball himself on a Saturday has a bigger impact on performance than we thought…well done for the shut outs Eddie.
Secondly, 2s stalwart Alex Laslett scored his first National League goal on Sunday – well done Lazza, you da man.

Squad: E. Rowney (England) (GK), E. Butcher, C Lloyd Hughes, A. Dunn, L. Zillmer, M. Farrer, D. Colquhoun, C. Jain, L. Kennedy, J. Miller-Hastings, C. Slade, C. Figgis, H. Corteen-Coleman, N. Buckingham